Fake But Nice:)

Once a Smoker was smoking at airport.........A gentleman came & asked him. How much do you smoke a day?

Smoker : Why are you asking such question?

Gentleman replied : If you had collected that money instead of smoking,the plane which is in front of you, would have been yours.

Smoker asked that gentleman : Do you smoke? Gentleman:-No. Smoker asked:- is that plane belongs to you? Gentleman replied:- No.

Smoker:-Thanks for your kind advice,but that plane is mine

[Smoker's Name - Vijay Mallya]

Moral of the Story : Unnecessary advice is injurious to health

Intelligent Husband....

A man and his wife went on vacation to Jerusalem. While they were there, the wife passed away. The undertaker told the husband, "You can have her shipped home for $5,000, or you can bury her here, in the Holy Land, for $150."
The man thought about it and told him he would just have her shipped home.

The undertaker asked, "Why would you spend $5,000 to ship your wife home, when it would be wonderful to be buried here and you would spend only $150?"

The man replied, "Long ago a man called Jesus Christ died here, was buried here, and three days later he rose from the dead. I just can't take that chance.

ಮದುವೆಗೆ ಮುಂಚೆ...

ಅವನು: ಅಬ್ಬಾ!!!
ಅವಳು: ನಾನು ನಿನ್ನನ್ನು ಬಿಟ್ಟಿರಬೇಕಾ?
ಅವನು: ಇಲ್ಲ!!! ಆ ರೀತಿ ಯೋಚನೆಯೂ ಮಾಡಬೇಡ.
ಅವಳು: ನೀನು ನನ್ನ ಪ್ರೀತಿಸುತ್ತೀಯಾ?
ಅವನು: ಸಂದೇಹವೇ ಬೇಡ... ಹಿಂದೆಯೂ ಮಾಡುತ್ತಿದ್ದೆ, ಮುಂದೆಯೂ ಮಾಡುವೆ.
ಅವಳು: ನನಗೆ ಎಂದಾದರೂ ಮೋಸ ಮಾಡಿದ್ದೀಯಾ?
ಅವನು: ಇಲ್ಲ!!! ಈ ರೀತಿ ಯಾಕೆ ಕೇಳುತ್ತಿದ್ದೀಯಾ?
ಅವಳು: ನನಗೆ ಮುತ್ತು ಕೊಡುತ್ತೀಯಾ?
ಅವನು: ಪ್ರತಿ ಅವಕಾಶಕ್ಕೆ ಕಾಯುತ್ತಿರುತ್ತೇನೆ.
ಅವಳು: ನನಗೆ ಹೊಡೆಯುತ್ತೀಯಾ?
ಅವನು: ಇಲ್ಲ!!! ನಿನಗೇನಾದರೂ ಹುಚ್ಚು ಹಿಡಿದಿದೆಯಾ?
ಅವಳು: ನಾನು ನಿನ್ನನ್ನು ನಂಬಬಹುದಾ?
ಅವನು: ಹಾ...
ಅವಳು: ಪ್ರಿಯತಮ!!!

ಮದುವೆಯ ನಂತರ...
ಬರೆದಿರುವುದನ್ನೇ ಕೆಳಗಿನಿಂದ ಮೇಲಕ್ಕೆ ಓದಿ...:)

Missing Husband

A woman went to police station to file a report for her missing husband:
Woman: I lost my husband
Inspector: What is his height
Woman: I never noticed
Inspector: Slim or healthy
Woman Not slim can be healthy
Inspector: Color of eyes
Woman: Never noticed
Inspector: Color of hair
Woman: Should be black
Inspector: What was he wearing
Woman: I don't remember exactly
Inspector: Was somebody with him ?????????
Woman: Yes my Labrador dog (Romeo), tied with a golden chain,
height 30 inches, healthy, blue eyes,
blackish brown hair, his left foot thumb nail is slightly broken,
he never barks, wearing a golden belt studded with blue balls,
he likes non veg food, we eat together, we jog together.
The woman started crying

Inspector: Let's search for the dog first!!!!!!!!!!!!!